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  “Elyse Ashby,” I replied, and he nodded thoughtfully as someone next to him spoke low in his ear. Tom blanched, and I straightened as he glanced at me. “What is it?”

  “I think you need to hear it from her, Bells. Or it could be a coincidence. Another Elyse Ashby. I don’t like to get in the way of anything.” Tom reached for his coffee, and I narrowed my eyes at him for a moment before pushing my plate away. One more game and I’d be going home tomorrow to deal with this stuff.

  I felt Justin watching me as I stood and left, walking through the lobby to the street. I told myself it was for a proper cup of tea, but I knew I was pissed. I wasn’t even sure who I should direct this at to begin with. Did I resent Elyse for not telling me something that was obviously heavy? Did I dislike the guys for not revealing what they knew? I reached into my pocket for my phone and considered searching for the answers myself, and cursed out loud.

  I shouldn’t do this. Things were going well with us, and I’d find this out as she grew comfortable with me. Sleeping with a woman didn’t mean she had to tell me her life story. I’d never even cared to know too much about a woman before this, so why did it suddenly matter with Elyse?

  I entered a coffee shop and ordered a tea and a bagel with cream cheese. I chose a table in the back and set my phone on the table, staring thoughtfully at it. If I searched Elyse and found something that was as serious as I expected it to be, that could change everything. I couldn’t go back from that, and I needed her to tell me.

  I sent her a message to ask how she was today. I’d try to ease into this. Elyse replied and said that she was attempting to paint today after the wine the previous evening. I looked back to the regret I felt about last night and falling asleep when I planned to call her. I meant what I said about not sleeping with other women, and jacking off on my own wasn’t working so well. Hearing her voice was enticing last night, and if I brought this up, I might never feel her again.

  We had a chat as I ate my breakfast, and I enjoyed how silly she sounded this morning. I didn’t have to hear her voice to pick it up since I’d been memorizing her since the day I met her.

  I miss you, Elyse. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. Will you stay the night with me?

  I’ll try to get a lot done so I can.

  Perfect. Have a great day.

  You too. Travel safe. You did great this week.

  I went to my home page, where the Google search bar was. Could I likely search her by name and discover this secret? I knew that at least one officer knew about it and that she seemed to have no contact with her parents. I knew that her father covered a lot of her bills, but she didn’t seem to have a personal relationship with him. I thought back to her reaction to the first game that she saw and how my aggression seemed to bother her.

  Did someone hurt her? Elyse was so young that it seemed hard to imagine. Then again, she did seem to have some thick walls around her. She was highly responsive to me now, but that did take a little while. That was something that she needed to tell me.

  I went back to the hotel and worked out in the gym for a solid hour. I went back to my room to shower and board the bus for my game in Pittsburgh. We practiced for a while and then went to get the pep talk from our coach. He was more positive than negative, but he could get pissed off. It was usually in defense of us, but I always kept quiet at these times. He sent us out there and told us to play like we did the other games, but to step it up a notch. Pittsburgh was a solid team that we’d need to work hard to beat.

  We lost by a goal. I showered and changed into street clothes for the bus ride to the airport. We were taking a red-eye tonight so we could be home sooner, though that was mostly for the players with families. Tonight, it was also for me. I planned to sleep in my bed for a while and spend as much of the next night awake with Elyse.

  I was going to get to the bottom of things with her before I left for another week.

  Chapter 11

  ELYSE

  I PAINTED THE last of my two pictures that week the day I expected Ryder to be home. I never told him so, but I missed him. I thought about him a lot as I painted, and when I tossed and turned alone in my bed at night. I slept great when I was wrapped up in his arms and wondered if it was because my father never held me when I needed him most. That got worse after losing Mom, and while I tried to fill the void with a few guys when I was older, it didn’t work as well as it did with Ryder.

  I didn’t want to need him. Needing him meant that I would have to tell him the truth about my life. Ryder was a compassionate person under the tough surface that he showed people. He would give me the pity that others did who knew my story. He would drive me away.

  I stepped back from the canvas and reached for my water. I sipped it as I eyed the painting critically. It was a harsh abstract since I’d been haunted by the past most of the week. I drank too much wine and struggled with a hangover the days following those nights. I still painted. I needed to make that a stable future for myself and try not to depend on someone else.

  I figured Ryder would call when he was home and settled. I took a long shower and let my hair dry into natural, loose curls before slipping on some leggings and a baggy T-shirt. I was clean even if he didn’t call, but I paused when I saw my phone screen light up. Ryder was calling me and I answered with a small smile. He asked me to come over for dinner and I agreed, assuring him that I’d drive.

  I changed into a gray off-the-shoulder shirt to go with the black leggings, and added mascara and lipstick before grabbing my keys and purse. It would get smeared, but I knew that he liked it when I wore it. I could clean up later. I waved at my next door neighbor as she drove by with the kids, and got into my car, starting the engine as I listened to the song on the radio. I felt like something was happening here as I pulled away from my townhouse, looking at the dark window of my studio.

  I drove across town to Ryder’s place and parked near his building. I ruffled my hair and stepped out of the car, careful of the boots I was wearing. There were some puddles on the ground from the recent rain, and I didn’t want the soft material to get destroyed. That said, I could easily buy some with my allowance from my father.

  I walked up to Ryder’s door and raised my hand to knock, but it opened before I made contact with the dense wood. Ryder stood there with damp hair wearing workout shorts. I sucked my breath in, realizing how much I missed him. He gestured for me to come in, and I walked past him as he leaned in to brush his lips against mine. “Hey there.”

  “Hi, how are you feeling?” I asked as he closed the door and pulled me against him.

  “I think I caught up on some sleep. Now, it’s time to spend time with you,” he growled against my neck.

  I smiled as I inhaled the scent from the kitchen. “What is that?” I asked as I turned in his arms.

  “I cheated and ordered in Indian food. I didn’t feel like cooking, which is utter shit after living on take out for a week.” His eyes searched my face, and he cupped my cheek before kissing me with a soft brush of his lips. “I missed you.”

  “I missed you.” There it was, out in the open. “The life of a pro hockey player, right?”

  “Something like that.” He took my hand and led me to the kitchen. “Let’s eat on the couch tonight.”

  We put our empty plates on the coffee table, and I let him set my glass of wine beside them as I dropped against the cushions. “I’m dead.”

  “I hope not. We’re nowhere near finished with this tonight.” Ryder turned towards me and pulled me against him.

  “You ate twice as much as I did. How can you move?” I grumbled as he smiled at me. Ryder kissed me and I stilled, forgetting about my aching stomach as I pressed closer to him. My body took control and I moved to straddle him, moaning as he cupped my ass.

  “You didn’t sleep with anyone else while you were away?” The words tumbled out of my mouth before I’d thought them over. The two glasses of wine were getting to me, and I closed my eyes as I tried to kiss him.
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br />   “Are you fucking serious right now?” Ryder asked with a frown. I blinked. “I thought about you all damn week, Elyse.”

  “I don’t know what I’m talking about. Sorry, I’m tipsy from the wine, Ryder. Just kiss me.” I moved towards him, and he stopped me.

  “You need to know that I am not just with you until I get bored. I feel something here, and I know you do. Just admit it,” he insisted, and I stared at him in the light from the lamps beside us. “I just want to know you, Elyse.”

  “I’m trying. I’m here and want to be here, Ryder. Know that.” I met his eyes and smiled weakly, seeing curiosity there. “I missed you. Okay?”

  “Good.” Ryder claimed me in a hungry kiss, and I felt him press me back against the couch. I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him closer, clawing at his back as raw need flooded me. We kissed and touched, making me marvel as he managed to kiss me and strip me. This man had some moves, but I didn’t want to think about the source of that. I just needed to focus on us and this moment.

  I gasped as Ryder kissed my jaw, nibbling gently before moving to my earlobe. He bit softly and tugged as I moaned, feeling him pop my bra open with his free hand. I blushed at the feel of my hard nipples as the material fell to the side, embarrassed by my reaction to him. He traced my skin with a finger, circling my sensitive skin as I arched my back. “Ryder, I need you.”

  “I’m going to enjoy every moment with you after being gone for a week.”

  I groaned at his words, just needing him inside me. He kissed me until I was breathless and then carried me to the bedroom to ravage my body with his mouth and hands, making me beg for him. I came on his tongue, and then he slid between my spread thighs.

  It was too much and not enough all at once. I was slick and ready for him as Ryder thrust inside, his mouth buried in my neck. I felt his breath and lips on my neck as he murmured to me in a heavy accent, making me wetter. I arched into him and reached down to pull him closer, and Ryder groaned my name as he began to move hard and fast.

  We came together, crying out as he slammed into me. I dropped my head back and stilled as he fell over me, protecting my body from his weight.

  “I missed you.”

  I smiled at his words, appreciating them. “I missed you too,” I admitted as he pulled up to look at me. We smiled before he kissed me tenderly, making me feel cherished and safe. Ryder slowly pulled out and rolled me to my side as he stroked my hair back.

  “Will you stay here with me?” he asked. I nodded with a smile. “I’m going to get some water.” He kissed my head and rose to head through the kitchen. I reached for a pillow and rested against it as I played back the night.

  He brought the water, and we settled in under the covers as he talked about the games and I told him about my painting. Ryder smiled when I told him that he inspired me and kissed me into silence. We ended up with him on his back as he pulled me over him, telling me to ride him. I did, and rocked slowly over him as I pressed my body up, too caught up in the moment to be shy. He was so deep, and I felt him everywhere as I whimpered. I felt Ryder staring at me, and gazed down to meet his eyes, bright with desire and something else I couldn’t recognize.

  I lost it first and cried out as he held my hips, guiding himself deep inside me as I struggled to stay up. The orgasm ripped through me every time and exhausted me, making me slump forward as he roared my name and came inside me. Ryder pulled me against him and stroked my back as we caught our breath.

  “I think you’re staying with me every night that I’m home. We need to make up for lost time,” he said.

  “I do work and paint, you know.” I smiled as he took my hair between his fingers.

  “We can switch. I’m open to that as long as you fall asleep with me every night.” That sounded serious, and I allowed myself to imagine the future for a moment. “It’s just us, Elyse. I know you want to go slow, but I don’t want anyone else. I’d like to see where this goes.”

  “Me too.”

  I woke up later, tucked under the covers with Ryder pressed up against me. He was warm, and I cuddled closer as I wondered when I fell asleep. He wore me out, so I wasn’t surprised. I looked around the room, lit only by the moonlight outside, and took in his sleeping body beside me. He was incredible. I enjoyed everything about him and wondered how much it was going to hurt when he moved on. Ryder was a well-known hockey player, and women must throw themselves at him. I wondered how he turned them away as he claimed, but I shut that down. I needed to believe him. More than that, I needed to trust him.

  I went back to sleep and woke when the sun was up. The bed was empty, and I looked around sleepily after I stretched. There was a folded piece of paper on the other pillow, and I reached over to grab it, yawning as I curled up on the pillow. It was from Ryder, telling me that he went for a run, but he’d be back soon. We could eat out or he’d cook for me.

  This man was perfect.

  I decided to surprise him with breakfast and pulled on a T-shirt. I used the bathroom and cleaned as best I could before heading to the kitchen. I managed to make a pot of coffee and checked the fridge for supplies. There were eggs and sausage, and I was setting it on the counter when I heard the front door open. Ryder walked in dressed in shorts and a fitted T-shirt. I glanced up and stared at him, taken aback by the sight.

  “What are you doing?” Ryder asked, walking towards me with a wicked smile.

  “I… I was going to make breakfast,” I heard myself stammer and blinked to bring myself back to reality. I couldn’t take my eyes away from him, and he stalked towards me. He pressed me against the counter, and I slipped my arms around his neck as he kissed me. Ryder lifted me and placed me on the counter, sliding a hand up my thigh as I shivered. I made this too easy with what little I was wearing. I moaned as he deepened the kiss and moved between my legs.

  I always imagined that a sweaty man wouldn’t be sexy. It seemed like it would be a mess, but Ryder was even better this way. He smelled of the outdoors and something spicy, and I stared at him as he pulled away.

  “Can we do something before breakfast?” he asked.

  “Like what?” I asked as he slipped his hands down my body, his thumbs tantalizingly close to my breasts.

  “A shower. I want to feel you again, Elyse.” His words made me shudder, and I slipped my hands over his shoulders.

  “You’re not hungry?” I asked weakly as my mind started to go blank.

  “I’m hungry for your sweet pussy.”

  He claimed my mouth with his, and I wrapped my body around him as Ryder lifted me to move to the bedroom. When we got there, he dropped me to the bed and ordered me to take the shirt off. I realized I was starting to see a different side of Ryder and that he might be a bit on the dominant side. After seeing him on the ice, that should have terrified me but instead, my body throbbed deep inside for him.

  I arched my back to lift the shirt off, and he removed his clothes. He was slick with sweat, but all I wanted to do was lick him clean. Ryder slipped down to the mattress and spread my thighs as I moaned, feeling how wet I was for him. He kissed up my legs as I dropped my head back, teasing me to my sex. Ryder brought me to the edge a few times before making me come around his tongue, lifting his eyes to gaze at me.

  “I need you inside me,” I begged. My voice rose with desperation, and he moved forward, drawing my feet to his chest.

  Ryder plunged inside me, and I cried out. He filled me, stretching me around him as he took me hard and slow. I didn’t know who I was when I was with him as I writhed under him, begging him for more. Ryder gave it to me, and I felt myself tense up before coming again, feeling him jerk forward. I felt my legs drop to the mattress as he pulled away, weak and boneless.

  “How am I supposed to want to do anything after that?” I asked dreamily as my eyes fluttered closed. I dimly heard him leave and come back to clean me with a warm washcloth.

  “We take a shower and freshen up and then make that breakfast.” He looked fresh and alert as
I stared at him in disbelief.

  “I can’t. I need a nap. Don’t you have practice or something?” I turned onto my side as he grabbed my legs.

  “Not until this afternoon before the game. I have a week of travel after that, so I need to get my fill of you.” Ryder dropped over me and kissed my stomach before moving up my body to take a nipple into his mouth. I moaned and slid my hands into his hair, needing him all over again.

  We took a shower after another hour in bed, and I slipped on his huge extra robe to make breakfast. I was starving and couldn’t wait any longer. I cracked several eggs in a bowl to scramble while he made a fresh pot of coffee for us. I heated a cast iron pan and melted some butter in it before pouring the contents of the bowl into the pan. While those cooked for a few minutes, I used a skillet to make the sausage patties.

  I had found a cookbook and some notes from Mom at some point when I was old enough to cook, and had memorized some of my favorite recipes. She made her eggs this way and I loved it, finding myself smiling as I thought about my vague memories of her.

  “Where are you?”

  I blinked as Ryder spoke close to my ear, looking at the food to make sure it wasn’t burning.

  “Just doing this. I get a little lost when I cook, particularly when a hot hockey player has his way with me all morning.” I stirred the eggs as he wrapped his arms around me and kissed my neck beside my ear. “I’m going to wither away to nothing, you know.”

  “With me in your life, there will always be enough food. I know how to balance things,” Ryder said.

  I chuckled and flipped the sausage as he watched over my shoulder. I was done with everything in a few minutes and plated the food, giving him double the amount of what I gave myself. We sat down at the table with coffee and ate quietly. We were both hungry, and I watched as he inhaled the food. I did that just a bit slower, and we washed the dishes together before moving to the couch.

  We watched TV and cuddled, sharing long kisses before Ryder reluctantly pulled away. “I need to pack my shit. We’re taking a red-eye after tonight’s game.” He kissed my jaw as I closed my eyes. “Fucking hockey.”